There has been several times in our lives we have screwed up
Several times we feel immovable and unusable by God
Or anyone for that matter
We have all felt worthless at one time or another
And the sad fact is we have all turned our backs on God and His Word
Thinking we cannot identify
We think that our problems will somehow drown themselves
And that if we just ignor all of our problems
They will somehow fix themselves
Like a broken toy or a scratched disk
They cannot work until they have been fixed and cleaned properly
Which is exactly how we were created
But still we prefer to live idle
Stalling for time. Waiting and hoping God will rear his head
And say here I am
Alright your ok again.Go ahead and live the way you have
But thats not the way it works
One of the reasons we find ourselves so empty
Or at least how I have observed lately
Is that our joy 8/10 of the time isnt permanent joy
We put our joy into circumstances and situations that do nothing for us spiritually
And then we suddenly question why in the world we find ourselves empty and alone.
We find ourselves alone in the dark crying out for something bigger
But feeling no movement.
Is because our joy is not in this world and it shouldnt be
(Now dont take this out of context and think we can never be happy)
Not the case at all.
But as I got to really pondering the fact I found the happiest times of my life are when I choose to follow the creator
And follow His words.A Sunday School answer but a very true Sunday School answer.
Consider Biblical heroes for a second
Alot of times we look in every other natural source of fufillment and pleasure because we do not think we can identify with the Bible
But its funny because if you look at some of the biggest biblical heroes we find that they are indeed human (believe it or not)
None of them were mutated spiritual superheroes with halos hovering above their heads.
Thye were the likes of adultrers,thieves,sluts,and murderers.
They all screwed up and they all came to a point in their lives where they said
God I have nothing left to give.
Are you there?
Am I not worth it?
Will I ever fix myself?
Will I ever amount to anything?
He was 80 when God called him to lead his people into the promised land.
Previously a murderer,now a shepherd called to lead a nation.
He committed not only adultry with a married woman, but murder to her husband
But also called a man after God's own heart
And this is where I'm really trying to hit here
Is that Solomon had the world at his feet
He had whatever it is that caught his eyes
And in the book of Ecclesiastes we see that Solomon knows how futile everything is
Vanity he says. Everything is vanity.(More than once)
This is a man with riches,servants,women,power,not to mention he was wiser than any man who had previously lived or would have ever lived.
How could he NOT be happy?
Still at the end he came to the conclusion
That everything that is futile on this earth would eventually pass away and that there would never be anything new
He would never find real joy on this earth because he looked everywhere but the source of his happiness
This world is not the provider of true joy for us.
In the words of Rick Warren "This life is just a dress rehersal for the real thing.
I'm only here for a short amount of time but I'll be spending trillions of years in eternity."
An incomprehensible amount of time in eternity
We're only here to prove to God that we want to spend our real "entire lives" with Him
And to bring as many people as possible.
And you could put out every excuse in the book (look at Moses)
But God dosent take excuses
Because he knows that no matter what you say
No matter what you have done or participated in in the past
That you are totally usuable.
Not only are you usable but also the fact that you will not find true happiness unless you are truly serving him.
So heres what I'm trying to get at
We all screw up
I have plenty of times
And I will screw up again and again
I will ignor Him
I will betray Him
I will dishonor Him
And we are never proud of those mistakes
But God forgives us.He wipes our slate clean whether we choose to believe it or not
He always watching out for us
Through thick or thin
Through hell itself he's holding our hands
And even if we tell Him no
He will still love us
He will still forgive us when we need to be forgiven
And he will still use us regardless
Everyone has a task they are called to fufilled
And if you havent experienced it yet or think that your not good enough
Your dead wrong
And God dosent need a huge person to do his task
All he needs is a willing heart
So chin up.
Know your joy is not in this world and that there is a light at the end of your darkness if your willing to seek it.
Know you are usable and that He is waiting to wrap his arms around you
No matter how bad you have screwed up
And believe me we've all screwed up
But God uses the week to fell the strong (David)
He takes the ugliest most violent things
And makes them timid beautiful creatures
And he brings triumphs to the downtrodden
What does it mean to truly, honestly surrender to God? And how do you die to yourself daily?
For a while I couldnt answer but now I can honestly say
That it only comes by realizing our own inadequacy to sustain ourselves on our own.
In anything.That we could not sustain ourselves on our own
And by being ready and expectant and excited to be used by Him.
For the Lord has wiped your past away and made your heart as white as snow
Forever and ever
End of story
And at the end of our story we can look forward to true eternal happiness
In the eyes of the Lord
(P.S. If I were you I'd pick up a copy of the book
"The Losers Club" for a more indept look at some of these Bible characters)
Beautiful and Broken